Featured Poet - Hales Rose


COMPANION


I unwillingly have a companion

Who resides inside my brain

Nestled just behind my eyes

Slowly driving me insane


My companion sits behind my eyes

Their perception leads the way

Burrowed down below my curls

Their thinking hard to sway


Here as one, my companion and I 

A unit despite much protesting

Joined for life inside this soul

Our beliefs often contesting 


I’ve tried to get my companion out

To split their thoughts away from the rest

Still they reside inside my brain

Sending darkness to my chest


I unwillingly have a companion

I’ve read books and I’ve cast spells

Said prayers and cleansed my spaces

Still this vessel’s where it dwells


VISITOR



Her hands trembled with hesitation

Knowing well what raps on the door

She stops a few feet back

Knowing it’s something she cannot ignore


Sweat collects upon her browline

Willing the visitor to go

She holding in her breath

Willing herself to tell them no


The knocking outside increases in speed

Demanding her attention now

She sees faint rays of light

Demanding for her to avow


Shining beams spill across wooden floors

Anxiety fills her heaving chest

She braces for impact

Anxiety knows her the best


Toward the door with a slow advance

Finally ready to give in

She knows the gift they bring

Again the cycle will begin


HAPPINESS I


Happiness

Was not a feeling

I held secure

For more than moments


Happiness

Was a brief reprieve

From troubled thoughts

Often gone to soon


Happiness

Was big, crashing waves

Cyclic storms and

Roller coaster rides


Happiness

Was just a notion

Outside of my

Capabilities


Happiness 

Just started knocking

Come to take me

For another stroll


HAPPINESS II


Happiness and I

We took another stroll

We traveled on familiar path

Among trees and grassy knoll


Happiness and I

We had some time again

We reminisced on foregone days

We laughed about what could have been


Happiness and I

We watched the sun go down

We headed back along the trail

My smile fading to a frown


Happiness and I

We climbed up to my door

Happiness grabbed my hand

Something she’d never done before


Happiness and I

We shared a lingering gaze

My eyes soon fix upon the moon

And then happiness sways


Happiness and I

We spun towards the stars

We dipped and soared - we dove and swung

Above winding roads and speeding cars


Happiness and I 

Fell freely to the ground

Landing lightly on green grass

I took a breath and looked around


Happiness and I

But I was all alone

A different light somewhere within

Companion quiet on their throne


HAPPINESS III


I once spoke of a stroll I took

Happiness was by my side

I spent the day within her midst

My every whim she would abide


I wrote of landing back on earth

She was no longer within reach

She held my hand and danced with me

Her company a temporary breach


I spent a few days wallowing

Alone without a light

My companion remained silent

Even in the dead of night


I woke one day with feeling

A bursting in my chest

Understanding now she’s been here

Providing a safer time to rest


Happiness would no longer arrive 

As something I see

Instead she joined in for the ride

Lingering inside of me


At first she sat under my curls

Holding my companion’s thoughts at bay

I began to see through clearer eyes

The beauty I’d swept away


As the days grew dark and dreary

Happiness’s voice began to fade

My companion regained harbored strength

The inner peace I’d built decayed


I try to keep my companion 

From taking complete control

I hope one day happiness returns

To take me for a stroll



ABOUT HALES

Hales is a queer writer based in St.Louis, Missouri, and has faced mental health challenges throughout her life. She is passionate about mental health awareness, social justice and advocacy, and using creativity to drive lasting change. Her poems aim to capture the ups and downs of living with mental health conditions.